I'm feeling so lazy and burnt out nowadays... I have no idea why. I still have 3 regents and 3 finals to look forward to. And I definately need to study for some of those. (Thank goodness, no AP Bio final!) It just seems so pointless nowadays. But it's not. Pointless, I mean.

Am I a bad kid? I keep wondering if I'm a good child to my parents. Like how come I'm still being locked up in my room if I get good grades and test scores and stuff? Why are my parents so afraid of me going outside and meeting people and hanging out with my friends? Am I like totally corruptable and must be sheltered from the world? I don't understand...

Like Flushing. It's Flushing. Nothing's gonna happen. Nothing happened in the city and obviously nothing's happening in Flushing. "Oh no, but you might get MUGGED". Oh. No. No. First off I've never heard of anyone being mugged in Flushing, and second of all, I'm not really a prime target for mugging since none of my clothes/accessories are expensive. It's not like I'm gonna venture in to gang territories and start a war. But that must be what my parents are thinking because they freaked out today when I told them I went to a friend's house in Wantagh. Because Wantagh is such a far-off and dangerous destination.

I keep thinking this must be a result of my failure as a daughter but I don't get it. I'm more afraid of me losing stuff constantly... not like getting mugged or robbed. What's gonna happen when I go away to college??? I'd better move somewhere far far away because otherwise they'd be wasting precious gas checking up on me every other weekend.

Arrrgh, it's not like they're giving me financial support either!!! Okay they pay for my tests. Which happen to be costly most of the time. But like, I feel like there should be a give-and-take relationship established. They'll give me tons of restrictions on what I do with my time and I'll take the money to pay for my field trips, clothes, supplies, and food. I suppose I should at least be thankful that they at least provide me with the ingrediants necessary to feed myself. And really, field trip costs I can handle okay. But clothes cost so much money nowadays!!! Urrrgh.... I think I have enough clothes to last me over the summer, due to the whole buying-stuff-before-korea thing that went on last summer. I really need a job. I'm running out of money FAST.

Our school's prom is tonight. How is it that I immediately think about how I'm going to finance prom stuff as soon as I hear that word? It's like I don't want to think about money... but money matters! I really want a nice, high-quality dress. Like that orange wonder-dress-contraption I word during the play!!!! So poofy on the bottom and just right on the top... Okay but kinda need a JOB because I have NO MONEY even IF i DID find the amazing dress of my dreams.

Oh man. I see a buttload of money going out of my pockets for senior year... Yearbook, t-shirts, trips, prom... dang...

Hm my grandmother's 70th birthday party tomorrow... I don't know what I'm wearing... It's not like I have a fitting dress for the occasion. I'm pretty sure I don't have a hanbok. Yet I'm guessing I can't really show up in t-shirt and jeans. Oh, well... Maybe this will motivate the parents to give me money to buy decent clothes.